. . . and they shall not be named

The actual season is upon us after this agonizingly long spring revue and the weird 25-man roster it engendered. I'm excited that we have a young first baseman. No one seems to think much of this guy, but I'll tell you what I like: he's a true Giant, signing right out of high school, and has logged 7 years in the system before getting his shot. Whatever else, Travis Ishikawa is a trouper--you have admire his persistence. I hope he mashes ML pitching! Across the diamond we have easily the most likeable and most talked about Giants prospect since, well, Tim Freakin' Lincecum. No one seems to know quite what to do with this kid, another true Giant, except to put a bat in his hands. A huge weight of expectations rests on Pablo Sandoval's rather large shoulders. Super-soph and true Giant Frederick Deshaun Lewis is my favorite position player, I'm really looking forward to watching his continuing maturity as a ballplayer. True Giant Emmanuel Burriss is the most interesting story, despite only 3 farm seasons (and a .684 OPS), he beat out the favorite for the 2nd base job. Who knew that "Manny-watch" meant this kid? That's FOUR, count 'em, FOUR farmhands, Giant signees all, in the lineup on Opening Day. That's pretty damn cool, eh? Two more make the list: true Giant Nate Schierholtz, my candidate for Most Screwed By The Old Guys Award, and Eugenio Velez (a 2005 Rule V guy), the winner of this years Weirdest Role Player Award. This isn't counting the pitchers, mind you, where young Giants are the stars. This club is, by degrees, transforming itself with youth and prospects. That's this year's story.

There's baggage of course, and the Giants Express will be burdened with this deadweight for a bit, well, some of it longer than a bit, but I'm going on a Lovecraftian "they shall not be named" jag in order to cope. I want nothing to spoil my fun watching The Youth Movement. Señor Slow (No. 1) will not be a Giant after this season, and maybe my prayers will be answered and he'll get shipped by the ASB. That Guy in RF (No. 2) is a fine fellow and a good ballplayer, so I can't work up the loathing I have for his CF neighbor. But fer chrissakes, can't we get Nate out there? Can't we move this guy? Rental (No. 16) serves as a daily reminder of the failure of our system to produce a major-league ready shortstop despite having one of the oldest players in the bigs man the position for THREE FULL SEASONS. What, we didn't see it coming? That one day even the beloved Omar Vizquel would get hurt and get that much closer to retirement? Did we think the guy would play into his 50s? Sheesh! I can hardly express the combination of fury and despair that accompanied the signing of Gomer (No. 33) for FIVE FREAKIN' YEARS. In fact, I can hardly write about it without an attack of the shakes. I cringe every time a ball is hit to center and every time he steps in the box. I cover my ears and close my eyes. I hum "me-me-me-me-me" real loud and run from the room. It's my nightmare and I'm stickin' to it!

Well, that's it, amigos. I'm stoked. Play ball.

Happy Pete

Pedro Feliz gets the game-winning hit in the World Series for his new ballclub. Now that's a story. I don't want to write it, though.

Congrats to the Phils, deserving winners. I'm happy that a National League team won.

The season is over. 2008 is in the books.

Sharpen your pencils, lads, 2009 is just around the corner.

I am ........... Losing it

Season….long.

Team…..not so good.

Need more sleep.....It’s a sharp slider over the outside corner, and Omar Vizquel lines a single into right field, the runner scores and the Giants win the game! I say slider, it was a curve over the inside part of the plate. I say single into right, it was more of a dribbler picked up by the third baseman, thrown over to first for the out. I say Omar Vizquel, it was Pablo Sandoval. I say the runner scored, but it seems no runners were on base, and the Giants waste yet another opportunity. I say the Giants waste an opportunity, but since no runners were on, it was really not that much of an opportunity at all. I say the Giants win, it is actually only the third inning..... Mr. T here, for….just about anyone with two nickels to rub together! Do you like lying around in a comfy new bed, drinking light beer while watching your choice of over three hundred channels of flickering images until you pass out in a pool of pale, watery vomit and urine? I know I do! You want to pass out, you need your bed peed! And with Coors, there’s no thinking involved! Just like on when you vote! Which, in my case, is a damn good thing! You know that phone call? The one you get from your lazy assed slacker employee who is pretending to be sick, and you know that they're not, and that you are going to get dumped on by YOUR boss because they have yet again blown off work without getting their assignments done and you think, this person will never, never, never, never see a promotion as long as I work here... you know that phone call? It won't change. The Giants are really not very good! And I say that without asterisks, without qualifiers, and without disclaimers! So get on down to your Toyota dealer, right now, without hesitation, whether you are wearing clothing or not, no matter what time of the night it is, don’t fuck around.

Falsetto chorus:Don’t fuck around.

Notes and Errata: Of the 63 pitchers who have thrown 180 innings, Zito is 59th in run support. Last night was the 19th time in his 32 starts where the Giants have scored 2 runs or less. In the run support ranking, Matt Cain is 62nd. Miss Yankee Stadium? Some folks in the neighborhood might feel differently. Saw Dave Zirin speak and picked up a copy of his latest book yesterday evening, a very unassuming and interesting sports fan. A People's History of Sports in the United States: 250 Years of Politics, Protest, People and Play. His point - the next time you hear about how sports and politics don't mix - don't believe it. Sports have been used to serve political ends for a long time.