Friday, April 18, 2008
3.2 8 9 9 3 4
Starting pitcher: M.C. O'Connor
Have you ever been knockin' back a few pints with yer bhoyos and got so caught up in the bonhomie and camaraderie that you had a few--well, several--too many? And you have to get home, you can't pass out on the fookin' barstool, so you suck it up and tough it out and stagger and weave and bob and somehow, someway, you manage to get to a safe place where you can collapse? Ever gobbled a little too much acid or mushrooms and realize the next 12 fookin' hours of my life are not my own? You hope whatever gods you can speak to in the interim that you can survive with your dignity, clothes, wallet and "permanent record" intact? No? Well, don't worry, mates, we've got the 2008 Giants. You don't NEED to have wretched, life-changing experiences to "wise up" and get sober. The 2008 Giants are a bad trip, a drunken binge, a root canal, a dose of herpes and an IRS audit all rolled into one! Matt Cain gave up MORE RUNS TONIGHT THAN IN ANY OTHER PREVIOUS START OF HIS YOUNG CAREER!!!!! Now there is certainly no shame in giving up the big fly to a fella like Albert Pujols. But that was just the dessert, the pièce de résistance tonight. He pitched like shit. It's going to happen. M.C. is going to have nights like this. This is the big leagues, there are no mulligans, no "do-overs." You either got the goods or you get lit up. Tonight our boy had bupkis. And he paid the price. All that's left to say is "shake it off, pal, get 'em next time." Y'know sumthin'? He will.