Saturday, August 21, 2010

Taking it out on Krukow

The game isn't over but I'm in a bad mood and I'm getting sick of Mike Krukow. How many times did he say "Gumby shoulders" tonight? What the fuck are Gumby shoulders? Gumby doesn't have any shoulders! I think once long ago he said it and everybody laughed even though they had no idea what he meant. Gumby's funny, right? So I thought maybe it's a well-known figure of speech in some circles, so I googled it, but - nothing!
And that ball Burrell misplayed in the left field corner- he said it was like Skee Ball. Well no it wasn't, I love to play Skee Ball and it was nothing like Skee Ball. Balls don't take funny sideways bounces in Skee Ball, they make lovely parbolas.
And I hate, absolutely hate the way he says "refreshing beer" in the Coors promo he does every game. Did he get instructions from Coors, did they tell him "Oh, by the way Kruk, when you get to the "refreshing beer" part we want you to say it like the most obnoxious man in the world would say it. Like you were just daring people to punch you in the mouth."

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Damn. You gots to chill homey. I don't mind those things, I even like some of those things. However, I point at things too when I get pissed about a loss. So, just let it all out. Timmeh's gotta reach lowest low sooner or later before he does better. Although I must admit, the defense did not help him much tonight. Better luck next time. Go Giants!

Anonymous said...

Ha ha, I googled "gumby shoulders" and your blog was the first hit.

But yeah, I agree, that was annoying.

Trafton said...

Look, I see that you're frustrated with the slump that the Giants are experiencing right now, but you shouldn't take it out on Krukow. The man is one half of the best duo in baseball broadcasting right now. There's no reason to bring him down too. If you're a true Giants fan, just leave Kruk and Kuip out of this.

If there's one thing I've learned while watching the Giants play over the last few years, it's there's a fine line between being a loyal fan and just turning the game off to maintain your mental stability.

Brother Bob said...

Aw, I dig Kruk (and Kuip), but sometimes his "dudeness" gets to be too much. You can tell he's always been "the dude" ever since kindergarten, the jock with all the buddies who are required to laugh their asses off at every dumb thing he says.

Brother Bob said...

PS I'm kinda psyched that my mention of gumby shoulders produced a listing on google.

Anonymous said...

Gumby shoulders is when the batter takes strike 3 and he thinks it's a ball all the way and he droops his dead down and shrugs his shoulders up high. Rubbery. Gumby.