Tuesday, May 14, 2013

The Vortex of Suckitude

Toronto is in Canada, and Canada is, like, weird. Case in point:

click to enlarge

All that green stuff? That's bad. They have green stuff in Toronto, but it's not grass. Canada is weird.

The Giants are normally a stalwart defensive club. "They catch everything" I always say. Good thing no one listens to what I always say. The blow-by-blow does not explain the Hunter Punce hee-yuk overthrow that failed to keep a double play possibility in order. It does not explain Nick Noonan and his concrete galoshes. Or his failure to turn the double play when one was in order. The whole mess, I'm trying to say, was not just Barry Zito's doing. I mean, two errors are actually listed up there, but that's not the half of it. The entire outfield and three-fourths of the infield looked bad at one time or another tonight. In Canada.

It must have been the Vortex of Suckitude. Good thing they pass over after a while. The team's titanium necklaces don't work inside one of those. R.A. Dickey, apparently, can conjure up the Vortex when he needs it. And Melky Cabrera, don't forget about him. He can, too. Ryan Vogelsong has his work cut out for him tomorrow. Maybe Brandon Belt will keep hitting, and Pablo Sandoval, too. After all, six runs is usually plenty.




Brother Bob said...

Driving home from work last night I turned on the midnight replay just in time for the bottom of the first. OMG. Suckitude is right. Don't blame Zito. It was a total team effort.
Speaking of Suckitude, did anyone watch Steph Curry last night? I guess it's the ankle.

Zo said...

Nothing like starting the game with an error and a walk to set things up.